Right before I got in the program, I tried to kill myself because I didn’t like the way I was living. That’s when I hit rock bottom.
I took battery acid. I bled through all my pores. I was unconscious for three days and my sister-in-law found me and brought me here.
I started doing drugs when I was twelve. My relationships were broken. My life was chaos. I didn’t have parents to guide me the right way because they were on drugs too. I lived in a broken home. I’ve never had a job. I sold drugs, made drugs, did home invasions, robbery, I did all kinds of stuff in my life.
I was broken. I lost my wife, lost my kids. Satan took everything from me. I wanted to die. I didn’t want to live. When I woke up from those three days, I knew I needed God in order to change.
Today, I’ve got eleven months clean in twenty years.
I feel joy now. I feel peace. I finally accomplished something in my life that I thought I would never accomplish. I never read the Bible before, now I read every night. I learn scriptures. I’ve got joy from God.
Once you learn about God, you’re life will be changed. Recovery only works because of God. I’ve learned that I’m deserving. I deserve a better life, and I deserve God.
The scripture I hold onto is when “Jesus said, Come to me all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens.” The only way to lift your burden is to bring it to God. Everything I’ve done in life is a burden I carry.
When I first got here, and beginning a relationship with God, it brings all that shame and guilt to the surface but it’s something you have to go through in order to lift that burden. It took me nine months to forgive myself for the things I’ve done.
Forgiveness makes me feel free. At ease. Peace. I feel good about myself. This is the first time I’ve ever felt that way.
My mom is really proud of me. I’ve got two of my kids back. One of them has never called me dad before and now he’s calling me dad.
I learned how to write here. I write about the Bible. I learned how to read better. I learned how to live a different way. I’m writing a book right now about my life. I’m calling it “The Journey”. Then my second book will be about “Open Doors” and giving my life to God. I’m never going back to that old life.